Eating Disorders in Midlife: The Hidden Struggle
When most people picture someone with an eating disorder, they imagine a young, thin, white teenager. This stereotype isn’t just wrong — it’s harmful. It erases the reality that eating disorders can, and do, affect people in every body size, gender, race, and age group.
And it means that for many women and gender-expansive people in midlife, their struggles go unnoticed — even by healthcare providers.
The Myth of “Aging Out” of Eating Disorders
There’s a common belief that eating disorders are something you “grow out of.” The truth? Midlife can actually be a vulnerable time for developing new disordered eating patterns or for old struggles to resurface.
Why? Midlife is a time of profound change — in identity, relationships, work, and, most noticeably, the body. Hormonal shifts from perimenopause and menopause can alter weight, appetite, metabolism, and body shape, sometimes triggering long-buried body image concerns or intensifying perfectionistic tendencies.
Why Eating Disorders in Midlife Often Go Unseen
Many midlife clients tell me they’ve been dismissed or misdiagnosed because of:
Weight bias: Providers focus solely on weight, assuming weight loss is always healthy — even when it’s a sign of restriction or illness.
Stereotypes: The belief that only young people have eating disorders prevents providers from asking the right questions.
Shame and secrecy: Years of hiding symptoms or normalizing disordered eating make it harder to speak up.
This invisibility can lead to delayed diagnosis and support — sometimes for years.
Common Triggers in Midlife
While every story is unique, some common contributors to eating disorder struggles in midlife include:
Body changes from perimenopause/menopause that are at odds with cultural ideals
Life transitions such as divorce, career changes, or children leaving home
Grief and loss, including the loss of a previous sense of self or control
Health scares that trigger panic around food or body size
Diet culture pressure, especially with the rise of “wellness” trends that disguise restriction as self-care
How This Work Looks in Therapy
In my practice, I approach midlife eating disorder recovery through:
A HAES® and fat-positive lens: Your worth is not tied to your weight, and health is not defined by thinness.
Body Trust® principles: Rebuilding a respectful, trusting relationship with your body — even as it changes — is central to healing.
Exploring identity shifts: Midlife is a time to question the roles and expectations you’ve carried and reconnect with your own values.
Addressing the systemic: Naming the ways ageism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, and weight stigma have shaped your relationship with food and your body.
Recovery at this stage is not about “getting your old body back” — it’s about coming home to the body you have now.
You’re Not Alone — and It’s Not Too Late
Whether you’ve struggled for decades or only recently noticed disordered eating creeping in, your experience matters.
Eating disorders in midlife are real, valid, and absolutely worthy of care. You don’t have to keep hiding, apologizing, or managing it alone.
If this resonates with you, I’d be honored to help you navigate recovery with compassion, skill, and a deep respect for your lived experience. Schedule a free 15-minute consultation to see if we might be a good fit.